"And there wasn't even a single 'know what I mean verne?' in the whole thing. Bogus." If you can tell me where that quote comes from, then
a) I'm totally impressed
b) I'm a little frightened
c) The rest of this post is for you
The last week was full of performances all over the city. It was in part hosted by our ultra-swank hotel "the Park" and had modern dance and other sorts of things. I am mildly averse to the Park Hotel because they boast having the best bar in the city, "the Leather Bar" and also boast some of the cities "best" restaurants. Basically they are tooting their own horn. I'm not impressed with them. Plain and simple, they wouldn't cut it in Chicago or New York. That's probably another gripe for another day. For all my misgivings with the Park, at least they do have the gumption to put on a nice festival.
I got to see the final three performances. The first was the aforementioned "From Madison to Madurai." The final two were dance performances, with the final night also having a musical selection preceding the dancing.
OPEN ADMISSION: I am an uncultured swine when it comes to dance. I know nothing, and I don't really appreciate it. If I do appreciate it, it's because it appeals to my untrained eye and those who understand it would probably ridicule me as being "childish" with the tastes. Now that THAT is over I'll continue with what I really meant to say.
The dancing didn't do it for me. The first night was traditional indian dance "turned on it's head." I can't tell if the dancers were good or not. I appreciated how difficult what they were doing was, but the dance itself made no sense to me. I thought a couple of the dancers were always late with their motions too, but then again I don't know anything. The second night was "avant-garde german dance" I knew with a description like that I'd hate it. It actually was mildly entertaining, despite the fact that it made NO F-ing SENSE! I was sort of done with the whole ordeal when one of the "dancers" who had done very little dancing up to that point starting vomiting on the microphone while "singing" moon river. I thought that was slightly over the line of decent taste. Nonetheless, I really did get something important out of the festival.
I realized the importance an attending cultural activities around Chennai. I will soon truly abandon my hope of nightlife and good times past 10:30 PM, but to supplement that Chennai has loads of performances. Again, I don't understand Karnatic music, but it sort of has a home here in Chennai. Films, plays, and dancing are also prevalent here. These are the things that Chennai's socialites attend. Without these things, the social structure of Chennai would be nothing. So indeed it is important to attend them at least from a social perspective. Truth be told, music is something I've always loved seeing live, I just haven't gone so much recently in the states because ticketmaster has caused prices to be eight-bajillion dollars for popular acts and 4 bajillion dollars for acts that I really want to see. Underground music is ok, but you have to know where to find it.
Chennai has LOTS of musical performances, and I might just get something out of them. If nothing else it is pleasant to veg out and listen for a while. Since the sense of urgency in America doesn't prevail here (outside of traffic and queues) most concerts have "nice" seating and one can just veg and listen.
All in all, the importance is being cultural in a new culture. I don't get it, and most of the time I won't like it, but it's better than being bored and close-minded.
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Getting Run Over for the Second Time
I'd gotten an insider's tip that the Sheraton on TTK road (actually the corner of TTK and Chamiers road) has a night club and happy hour on Wednesday. Last night, being Wednesday, I decided to go check it out. It's the same story everywhere in Chennai apparently. Nightclubs charge double for a 12 oz kingfisher as regular bars charge for a 650 ml. That being said I decided I'd go in anyway and see what the buzz was about. Perhaps it's a weekend type place. I did happen to see a few westerners in there. They were all men (shock and awe). There were in fact women dancing though. There were three of them (surrounded by 5 more men). The music was way too loud to do anything other than eat the bar snacks, drink beer, and watch the crcket highlites of the day, so that's what I did. I suppose this place will be more lively on the weekends at 10PM.
Luckily, said Sheraton is walking distance (a longish walk) from my apartment. So I took the train toward the apartment and walked instead toward the hotel. In the meantime I'd heard there is a nice Thai restaurant (nothing beats eating curry, like eating more curry!) just up the road. I walked up to it and must have seemed very awkward because I was dining alone. Oh well. The food was tasty and overpriced by Indian standards. I paid about half of what I would have for an identical meal in the states. But I was happy to eat non-Indian fare for a night.
On the way, however, I got run over for the second time, this time by a small car. I can't say run over properly, but I was walking and this guy tried to get ahead of me and hit my arm with his car. This merits some mention:
An Indian friend of mine tries to explain some of the Indian mentality to me by saying, "might is right." I've seen a similar style of driving in the middle east before. Whomever has the loudest horn has the right of way. Yikes! What I notice over and over and over again is that I'll be walking along and there is CLEARLY much more room to go behind me than in front of me. Generally speaking I walk pretty close to the sidewalk (sidewalks here are not made for walking, that's another post). When I cross the street at a T-crossing or whatever I go directly from one side to the other. I'm not comfortable dilly-dallying in the street. The traffic is too crazy. More often than not, and I mean something like 9 to 1 if a motorcycle of car is coming out of the side street they will drive IN FRONT of me crossing the street to get into the road. Are you kidding? Give me one second and I won't even be in the road at all. It makes matters harder to comprehend when about half the time the motorcycles are driving into the road on the wrong side for traffic flow. I don't understand what the rush is. I never have, I never will (Insh'allah). A few Americans have mentioned that I might be able to afford a car here. While it is true, that my financial savings would not take much of a hit at all buying a car here, my nerves would. I'd be in a wreck every damn day. I'm already the only person I know who has been in any sort of an accident (completely amazing to me, since I tend to be rather careful).
Last night's run over was even more peculiar in that I was standing on the street corner at a busy intersection waiting for a time to go. I wasn't even moving and this car came by and hit my right arm. DOUBLE U, T, and F? It happened a bit too quickly for me to react as well. The traffic was so busy I couldn't fathom someone just turning left into it, but apparently that is the way things are done here. I saw in that same minute about 3 near miss accidents, but I was the only one who got hit. Go figure!
Luckily, said Sheraton is walking distance (a longish walk) from my apartment. So I took the train toward the apartment and walked instead toward the hotel. In the meantime I'd heard there is a nice Thai restaurant (nothing beats eating curry, like eating more curry!) just up the road. I walked up to it and must have seemed very awkward because I was dining alone. Oh well. The food was tasty and overpriced by Indian standards. I paid about half of what I would have for an identical meal in the states. But I was happy to eat non-Indian fare for a night.
On the way, however, I got run over for the second time, this time by a small car. I can't say run over properly, but I was walking and this guy tried to get ahead of me and hit my arm with his car. This merits some mention:
An Indian friend of mine tries to explain some of the Indian mentality to me by saying, "might is right." I've seen a similar style of driving in the middle east before. Whomever has the loudest horn has the right of way. Yikes! What I notice over and over and over again is that I'll be walking along and there is CLEARLY much more room to go behind me than in front of me. Generally speaking I walk pretty close to the sidewalk (sidewalks here are not made for walking, that's another post). When I cross the street at a T-crossing or whatever I go directly from one side to the other. I'm not comfortable dilly-dallying in the street. The traffic is too crazy. More often than not, and I mean something like 9 to 1 if a motorcycle of car is coming out of the side street they will drive IN FRONT of me crossing the street to get into the road. Are you kidding? Give me one second and I won't even be in the road at all. It makes matters harder to comprehend when about half the time the motorcycles are driving into the road on the wrong side for traffic flow. I don't understand what the rush is. I never have, I never will (Insh'allah). A few Americans have mentioned that I might be able to afford a car here. While it is true, that my financial savings would not take much of a hit at all buying a car here, my nerves would. I'd be in a wreck every damn day. I'm already the only person I know who has been in any sort of an accident (completely amazing to me, since I tend to be rather careful).
Last night's run over was even more peculiar in that I was standing on the street corner at a busy intersection waiting for a time to go. I wasn't even moving and this car came by and hit my right arm. DOUBLE U, T, and F? It happened a bit too quickly for me to react as well. The traffic was so busy I couldn't fathom someone just turning left into it, but apparently that is the way things are done here. I saw in that same minute about 3 near miss accidents, but I was the only one who got hit. Go figure!
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Pissing in the Street
I'll apologize first that I have no pictures of said activity. I'm not really brave enough to whip out the camera and take a photo of a guy urinating.
I also need to concede firstly that the United States is not free from street urination. In fact, what man, who regularly attends bars late in the evening, hasn't been walking home from the pub or bar and had to pull over for a moment of reprieve? I'd venture to say many men have done so. The difference in the two approaches is this:
In America we still try to hide the act even when no one else is around. Toilet duties have in our minds become a very private issue. In India this is generally true, but one cannot walk around for a day without seeing a dozen men relieving their bladders in public.
An Indian friend of mine seems to be embarrassed by this truth. However, I don't see why he should feel this embarrassment. The way sewage seems to work in this part of India is that waste gets dumped directly into a river or a canal or the bay of bengal. The idea of urinating directly into a canal shouldn't be such a big issue given the sewage management. I don't see the problem.
Again, a disclaimer: I am too American to pee in the street as openly as it is accepted here. At the same time I don't really see a problem with it socially, I can't bring myself to do it. Even when I was on the bus back from Pondicherry there were several unannounced stops in which men jumped off, peed in the bushes and jumped back on the bus. Sanitary, no. Useful, absolutely!
I don't think there's too terribly much more to say about it. It's just another phenomenon that is totally usual and commonplace here, but would be considered quite out of place back home.
I also need to concede firstly that the United States is not free from street urination. In fact, what man, who regularly attends bars late in the evening, hasn't been walking home from the pub or bar and had to pull over for a moment of reprieve? I'd venture to say many men have done so. The difference in the two approaches is this:
In America we still try to hide the act even when no one else is around. Toilet duties have in our minds become a very private issue. In India this is generally true, but one cannot walk around for a day without seeing a dozen men relieving their bladders in public.
An Indian friend of mine seems to be embarrassed by this truth. However, I don't see why he should feel this embarrassment. The way sewage seems to work in this part of India is that waste gets dumped directly into a river or a canal or the bay of bengal. The idea of urinating directly into a canal shouldn't be such a big issue given the sewage management. I don't see the problem.
Again, a disclaimer: I am too American to pee in the street as openly as it is accepted here. At the same time I don't really see a problem with it socially, I can't bring myself to do it. Even when I was on the bus back from Pondicherry there were several unannounced stops in which men jumped off, peed in the bushes and jumped back on the bus. Sanitary, no. Useful, absolutely!
I don't think there's too terribly much more to say about it. It's just another phenomenon that is totally usual and commonplace here, but would be considered quite out of place back home.
From Madison to Madurai
A few night ago I attended a performance of a travelogue called "From Madison to Madurai." It is a monologue delivered by HR Britton who is an American who attended University of Wisconsin and traveled to India for a 6 month adventure after he graduated.
The venue was at a government theater which was beautiful although it certainly had a terribly british feel to it. The audience was (no surprise) a majority south indians along with the socialites of chennai and a few random faces such as my own.
I sat and listened with interest and laughter. "H," as people call him is very American. He looks American, talks American, and is in every way I can think to describe him American. Let me certainly state, I don't find this to be a bad thing. What I really got out of the performance is the idea that I identified with him as strongly as anyone I've yet met in India. I got a chance to meet him a couple nights later and I told him that I identified with many parts of his story.
He had come to India in the early-mid-nineties as a 23 yr old college graduate. He'd been reading about buddhism, hinduism, and several other varieties of eastern philosophy and decided to come to India for reasons related to his readings. This will be the biggest difference in our stories.
He made many observations from an American (midwestern even) point of view. I appreciated how EXACTLY true most of his observations rang to me. After the show I heard several Indians mentioning that his observations were "American." I couldn't help but to think, "Well, yes. Yes they were." I sort of thought that was the point and that was where the humor was derived.
I thought that I could make a similar story to his, but he came here to see a lot of south india, and knew a lot about the philosophy. Perhaps what might've been his biggest surprise was that the ancient philosophies don't have a stronghold on life now as much as the scholastic articles and books written on these philosophies might suggest. I can't be certain, but I have to say I enjoyed hearing a different version of my own story told by a good story teller. To be totally honest, he is a phenomenal story-teller and I think Jonesboro, TN would be well off inviting him to come to the story-telling festival next fall...
The venue was at a government theater which was beautiful although it certainly had a terribly british feel to it. The audience was (no surprise) a majority south indians along with the socialites of chennai and a few random faces such as my own.
I sat and listened with interest and laughter. "H," as people call him is very American. He looks American, talks American, and is in every way I can think to describe him American. Let me certainly state, I don't find this to be a bad thing. What I really got out of the performance is the idea that I identified with him as strongly as anyone I've yet met in India. I got a chance to meet him a couple nights later and I told him that I identified with many parts of his story.
He had come to India in the early-mid-nineties as a 23 yr old college graduate. He'd been reading about buddhism, hinduism, and several other varieties of eastern philosophy and decided to come to India for reasons related to his readings. This will be the biggest difference in our stories.
He made many observations from an American (midwestern even) point of view. I appreciated how EXACTLY true most of his observations rang to me. After the show I heard several Indians mentioning that his observations were "American." I couldn't help but to think, "Well, yes. Yes they were." I sort of thought that was the point and that was where the humor was derived.
I thought that I could make a similar story to his, but he came here to see a lot of south india, and knew a lot about the philosophy. Perhaps what might've been his biggest surprise was that the ancient philosophies don't have a stronghold on life now as much as the scholastic articles and books written on these philosophies might suggest. I can't be certain, but I have to say I enjoyed hearing a different version of my own story told by a good story teller. To be totally honest, he is a phenomenal story-teller and I think Jonesboro, TN would be well off inviting him to come to the story-telling festival next fall...
Monday, December 7, 2009
A very peculiar incident indeed
The third day I was in India I bought a quarterly pass for the Chennai metro railway system. It cost me Rs 295. I put it in my wallet and it hasn't seen the light of day since. Really, I don't know why the government bothers selling tickets to riders. Hardly anyone buys them and I've never seen a ticket checker, until this morning that is. I've now been here for four full weeks and not a single ticket check. Not even on the train traveling down to Pondicherry!
Well, this morning I see a lone woman collecting money in my compartment of the train, and what is my assumption? Of course, I assume she's a beggar, because I've seen that before. This woman, however, did not at all look like a beggar. She was well built and quite tall for a woman (by Indian standards of course) she must have been 5'5". When she turned toward me I saw she was wearing a badge of some sort and the money she was collecting was for train tickets not already bought. I waited and she kept coming toward me checking everyone's pass one by one. She gets to my corner of the train and checks all the men around me and ignores me. I thought I was completely home free. She turned around and checked some travelers just getting on the train.
At this point I was simply holding my train pass, because I'm trained to follow rules when it comes to transportation (the biggest reason I won't drive here). I got mildly worried, because the identification I'm required to hold with this ticket is my passport. I don't carry my passport on my person very often. I leave it locked up at my apartment. But the woman had passed me by. Just as she turned away from me I put my ticket away and THEN she turned to check my ticket, go figure...
So I showed my ticket (without proper ID) and she checked the date, said nothing to me and went on checking others' tickets.
A single main question comes to mind (being the mathematician of sorts that I am):
If I never bought a ticket and took the risk of riding "naked" as it were would I save any money? The answer is, at 5 Rs. per ride and 295 Rs for a quarter of train rides, it doesn't matter at all. The trains are so heavily subsidized that the money spent by the riders is nothing more than a drop in the bucket.
Well, this morning I see a lone woman collecting money in my compartment of the train, and what is my assumption? Of course, I assume she's a beggar, because I've seen that before. This woman, however, did not at all look like a beggar. She was well built and quite tall for a woman (by Indian standards of course) she must have been 5'5". When she turned toward me I saw she was wearing a badge of some sort and the money she was collecting was for train tickets not already bought. I waited and she kept coming toward me checking everyone's pass one by one. She gets to my corner of the train and checks all the men around me and ignores me. I thought I was completely home free. She turned around and checked some travelers just getting on the train.
At this point I was simply holding my train pass, because I'm trained to follow rules when it comes to transportation (the biggest reason I won't drive here). I got mildly worried, because the identification I'm required to hold with this ticket is my passport. I don't carry my passport on my person very often. I leave it locked up at my apartment. But the woman had passed me by. Just as she turned away from me I put my ticket away and THEN she turned to check my ticket, go figure...
So I showed my ticket (without proper ID) and she checked the date, said nothing to me and went on checking others' tickets.
A single main question comes to mind (being the mathematician of sorts that I am):
If I never bought a ticket and took the risk of riding "naked" as it were would I save any money? The answer is, at 5 Rs. per ride and 295 Rs for a quarter of train rides, it doesn't matter at all. The trains are so heavily subsidized that the money spent by the riders is nothing more than a drop in the bucket.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Indian Methodology Part 4: Bicycles, Scooters, and Motorcycles
Riding Three to a motorcycle
Riding three to a scooter
PEDALING THE WRONG WAY!!!!
Extremely common scene, everyone two to a cycle, no helmetI can contain myself no longer! I’ve been asking myself many of the same questions from day one, but this one irritates me as much as any. Why the hell do you pedal a bicycle with your heels or the arch of your foot? I can’t take it anymore. I said it once before, but I’ll repeat for posterity. This is the reason India has none of it’s 1,160,000,000 citizens to ride in the Tour de France. What eats at me more about this nonsensical pedaling style is that it generates no power and can seriously injure your foot if you try to do so. Power needn’t be such an issue, but when you pedal around 2,3,4, or 5 people at a time, or more customarily a huge-ass cart full of fruit or other goods you need to generate some power. Am I wrong in assuming one you learn how to ride a bicycle you experiment with what’s comfortable and what works when picking out your own style? I think not. Somehow, everything here is rushed, rushed, rushed when traveling. Crowd around as much as possible and get to destination fast, fast, fast then do nothing. Except on bikes! What’s going on here. Bikes move so much more slowly and people seem to be comfortable with this. In fact I can jog as fast as most people ride. I saw a kid once riding here and he was on a bike that was WAY to big for him. He had to extend his legs all the way and push down his tip toes just to get the pedals all the way around. Wouldn’t you know it, the kid was blowing by everybody! Hello, am I the only who sees this and is terribly confused by it?
Where's Waldo? Finding Americans in Chennai.
Sitting in a coffee shop owned by a woman from Brooklyn in the French quarter of a South Indian city I found myself conversing with an Englishman and a man from Washington, D.C. who lives in Chennai. Mildly bizarre I guess. But I suppose foreigners have a way of finding each other, no matter where they may be.
I think back to Chicago and little India, little Vietnam, Chinatown, Ukranian village, Greek town, Pilsen, and the literally dozens of other ethnic communities that have sprung up all over the city. Foreigners have a way of finding each other. It is sort of important so that they (we) may have a sense of normalcy in the face of a new place, a new time, and often a radically different culture.
My new American friend from Chennai has been here a few years and most of the time consults with American companies so is pulling in something very close to an American salary. Let me be clear. If I made an American salary here, I might never want to leave. Sure the culture shock would be intense, but I'd never have to worry about buying anything I'd like. I could hire servants to do anything around the house, cook for me, be on call 24/7 etc. Finding a way to bring good quality fresh foods from around the world would be mildly more challenging, but American money can afford that here. Let's put it this way: I haven't even spent my month's salary of ~$300 since I've been here, and an American consultant can charge a company with international intentions that much PER HOUR! This guy at times can make my monthly salary in ONE HOUR! It's certainly not the norm, but to say the least he can live richly here.
Now, since he has the means to afford anything he damn well pleases here I asked him about stuff in Chennai. He told me at the consulate there is an American Club. It only requires an American passport to enter. Hey, I have one of those! Almost all the American (especially those earning American salaries) hang out there from time to time. After a while one figures out how to buy off the correct authorities to get the things one wants. Again, on American salaries, those payoffs probably don't hurt very much. It's hard to say for sure, I don't have enough money to buy off anyone for any reason (sadly). Well, I'm told (TOLD) that these crazy americans who aren't fond of turning in on saturday night at 10:30PM have "after parties." To my ears that sounds like, "having a normal party." So my goal is to go find these said americans. I'm willing to bet the wealthier ones know the wealthier europeans engaging in nearly identical activities and they have the in.
I am sort of the anomaly here. I'm an American living in India on an Indian salary. It makes my experience much difference. My guess, is that none of these americans will get to sit in a slum hut at a random invitation or play cricket with kids who have nothing but one set of clothing. I guess I'd like to have the sense of normalcy afforded by being an American, but am more than willing to break out into real Indian society. That's why I came here. It has become my new project (socially) to be able to exist in both worlds simultaneously (makes one think about my academic problems concerning quantum coherence, or maybe not).
I think back to Chicago and little India, little Vietnam, Chinatown, Ukranian village, Greek town, Pilsen, and the literally dozens of other ethnic communities that have sprung up all over the city. Foreigners have a way of finding each other. It is sort of important so that they (we) may have a sense of normalcy in the face of a new place, a new time, and often a radically different culture.
My new American friend from Chennai has been here a few years and most of the time consults with American companies so is pulling in something very close to an American salary. Let me be clear. If I made an American salary here, I might never want to leave. Sure the culture shock would be intense, but I'd never have to worry about buying anything I'd like. I could hire servants to do anything around the house, cook for me, be on call 24/7 etc. Finding a way to bring good quality fresh foods from around the world would be mildly more challenging, but American money can afford that here. Let's put it this way: I haven't even spent my month's salary of ~$300 since I've been here, and an American consultant can charge a company with international intentions that much PER HOUR! This guy at times can make my monthly salary in ONE HOUR! It's certainly not the norm, but to say the least he can live richly here.
Now, since he has the means to afford anything he damn well pleases here I asked him about stuff in Chennai. He told me at the consulate there is an American Club. It only requires an American passport to enter. Hey, I have one of those! Almost all the American (especially those earning American salaries) hang out there from time to time. After a while one figures out how to buy off the correct authorities to get the things one wants. Again, on American salaries, those payoffs probably don't hurt very much. It's hard to say for sure, I don't have enough money to buy off anyone for any reason (sadly). Well, I'm told (TOLD) that these crazy americans who aren't fond of turning in on saturday night at 10:30PM have "after parties." To my ears that sounds like, "having a normal party." So my goal is to go find these said americans. I'm willing to bet the wealthier ones know the wealthier europeans engaging in nearly identical activities and they have the in.
I am sort of the anomaly here. I'm an American living in India on an Indian salary. It makes my experience much difference. My guess, is that none of these americans will get to sit in a slum hut at a random invitation or play cricket with kids who have nothing but one set of clothing. I guess I'd like to have the sense of normalcy afforded by being an American, but am more than willing to break out into real Indian society. That's why I came here. It has become my new project (socially) to be able to exist in both worlds simultaneously (makes one think about my academic problems concerning quantum coherence, or maybe not).
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